We have both been seeing a counselor and do not have a future decided for us yet.

We have been talking and communicating more to understand what happened and how.

She has ceased blaming me for the cheating and accepts it was on her to cheat.

She also says she did feel 'disconnected' from me since some time now but that did not cause her to cheat.

She says she finds sex more enjoyable when she is cheating and that she moved on from one guy to other for the same kick and thrills.

She says I should not kill myself to be with her for kid's sake and should do what is best for me(hinting divorce).

Although I am thinking about amicable divorce, must admit I am no good living all by myself and can't imagine marrying again in near future. It really really pains me to think what my kid will have to go through when people/friends ask her questions about daddy staying elsewhere. I love this family too much to divorce her.

I do not hate her at this point but resent her for the betrayal.

Maybe this is a problem with no solution. I don't know what I should do.