I don't think I am close to deleting those emails but I haven't been rereading them. I'm not sure if I mentioned I sent one more... A short one, because I'm not sure if the long one I sent was successful at not sounding angry... Just a short one a clear olive branch.

What I have been good at is not obsessively checking for a reply. Yesterday I got some "bings" on my email and decided not to look at them until after I ate in case it might kill my appetite again. I ate relaxed assuming the emails were NOT from him and indeed they were not.

This morning an email came in and it IS from him. I haven't looked at it yet. I'm simply trying not to be obsessed about it. My ipod shows me the first line which is "I'm sorry I didn't realize that..." so maybe it is a sincere apology and some understanding. Or it could be "I'm sorry I didn't realize that you are such a crybaby..." LOL I doubt that but it still might contain some criticism. So while I hope it might ease my mind I'm trying not to get my hopes up and not to obsess about it.

I was back in bed for a few hours today but that's been pretty common, at least I showered and dressed in the morning and I took all of my meds (including my new ones which have me nauseated) and I had some soup. Thirsty now so I think I'm just going to make sure I'm not getting dehydrated.