I'm still processing what my father said yesterday in tandem with the fact my daughter is still disobeying me and spending the night at her boyfriend's house on a school night. Neither my father nor her father are intervening and yet both are blaming and judging me for her behavior. To say its not fair would be an understatement. Luckily one of my therapists gave me the number for a mobile crisis unit I can call next time I need assistance as the police giving her a ticket has done nothing to stop her behavior. So for the most part I do not contact with my father or her father because it is further trauma on top of the trauma her behavior is causing me. So I'm dealing with my flashbacks from my adolescence , her behavior, and shaming by my father and her father. Its a toxic stew.