My strongest motivation to live comes from knowing that I make a difference to others and that I am needed and useful. I also rather enjoy the small and not so small things in life, such as the people I love, hobbies, the beauty of nature, a nice day, ... Although sometimes when things are going really badly my focus is narrowed and those things I just mentioned don't seem to be worth the pain and struggle. Knowing I make a difference for the better in others' lives always makes a difference to me, no matter how badly I may feel.

I'm sorry you've had such feedback. It's difficult to overcome suicidal thoughts (or anything really) when the people who are supposed to help you don't believe you ever will. I don't know your particular situation but I can't see that kind of feedback as being in any way productive. Also, personally I would consider depression, anxiety and suicidal thoughts to be very major things to keep working at in therapy. Not to try to convince you to stay, just thought I'd mention it, for what it's worth. You know you have wonderful people and things in your life ... You deserve to really enjoy all of that