Okay, so I'm a fifteen-year-old girl. 5'3 1/2", 130 lbs.

Sixth grade, I started gaining weight. My self-image was absolutely terrible. I wore an oversized hoodie every day and eventually couldn't stand to take it off because I simply couldn't bear to look at my bulging stomach.
At my highest, I was 5'2 1/2", 140 lbs.

Last year, from eighth to ninth grade, I decided to lose weight. I gained control of my eating habits and exercised daily.
At my lowest, I was 5'3 1/2", 122 lbs.

Of course, I can't accredit ALL of that success to hard work and self-control. I've struggled with depression since I was very young, and halfway through last year, when I was having a hard time, I was put on Zoloft, which sent me on a downward spiral.
At first it was pretty good. My periods were regular and not as taxing, it regulated my sleep, and best of all, I could be more lieniant in what I ate and I didn't gain weight.
Then it got me even more depressed and eventually suicidal. Needless to say, I had to get off the meds immediately.

Nowadays, it seems like no matter what I do, I can't continue to lose weight. I watch what I eat very carefully, but I simply can't eat like everyone else does. I've restricted my intake as much as possible (still eating balanced, nutritious meals three times a day), but if I just so happen to eat a cup of ice cream two days in a row, I'll gain weight.
I begin to wonder if it's a stress issue. The way my body is shaped, I'm very muscular except through the middle (I have well-developed triceps and I don't work my arms at all).

More importantly I'm afraid that I may develop an eating disorder. Whenever I eat, I'm very aware of the calories, fat, and nutrition of everything. No matter what I'm eating, as soon as I feel satisfied, I'm suddenly very conscious of my stomach, which still is and has always been flabby and jiggly. So I guess I feel kind of on the edge.

I don't like to feel this way about food, but it's been this way for such a long time that I don't know how to deal with it anymore.