This is horrific......the same as being held captive in a POW camp. I hope you will find someone to help you. I found an amazing therapist who specialized in spiritual abuse a few years ago.
In order to survive I know you need to believe your parents loved you.but love is not what they did.....tortured with beatings, water thrown on you and strangulation......unbelievable abuse....As I said sadistic guards in a POW camp; this is how they torture prisoners.

Again, I hope you will find a therapist, survivor's group, etc....to help you.