Patty,

I have to agree with your term "naive" definitely applies much more than the word "easy"..I definitely think that explaines the behavior much more than "easy"....thank you for providing the correct word. I agree that easy are girls that are out to just have fun with sex & want to do it right off without having any relationship.....where the naive does think there is a relationship there however wrong that thought is in reality.

I never could understand the women that get the huge diamond rings & absolutely live for their husbands....the question I always have is who are they other than the wife? Some women are very happy & do have a life while being that way.....I am sure their being is based on the charities they are involved in & the groups they are involved it. The one idea that I just couldn't understand was my Mother & my grandmother & probably many other women around that time who the only thing is seemed was that they were the slaves to their husbands....nothing outside of the house....cleaning & cooking everyday & nothing else. I know my Mother was happy with that life & had no concept of how I wanted more out of my life....I wanted MY life & not my life for someone else. I still feel that way....which is probably why I don't have a successful marriage. I have never been willing to live for someone else & no one in my life has been or ever will be that important to me. Maybe it is selfish, but I need to know that I am a person not based on who I am to someone else. I believe that a marriage can actually be that way if the right 2 people get together....guess I just wasn't lucky enough to find that person & have been tolerating....or maybe I should say fighting where I have been for too many years.

I remember guys in college would try to pressure me into being what they wanted....as soon as they tried....DUMP!!!!....but I swore watching my Mother & my Grandmother that I would never allow my life to go that way. I know that most of my Mothers problem was that she had no self esteme ever & I ended up even as a child in grade school pushing her into volunteering her & getting out of the house.

The sad thing was that she became herself only after my Dad died..until then, she was living & doing all for him & not for herself.....why one looses themselves for someone else is beyond me.

I will do for others...I have opened my house to people who have needed a home....I have helped people out with things they need, but I have limits & then they start imposing themselves beyond those limits....that is when I cut things off. Over the years, I have learned where the appropriate limits are...between helping others & not being good to myself. I think that is the important thing in how we allow men to treat us....if our actions demand respect....I have found that is comes naturally.....when we allow people to walk all over us & take advantage of us.....even in relationships.....that is when we get hurt & the sad thing is that we have allowed it most of the time.

Honestly I don't know where my thoughts came from because it wasn't what I was brought up with or around......the individual in me has always been there....sometimes a bit lost, but it's always there underneath fighting to get out.

I haven't won huge diamond rings with this attitude, but what I have if of much more value to me than diamonds

Debbie