At first, it's all pretty scary because you have no idea why these things are happening and some of the side effects are so severe and hit you like a train. The symptoms will always suck but the more facts you learn, the easier it is to learn how to cope with them. If you have questions about these symptoms, it isn't going to hurt to call your doctor so that they can walk you through what's happening. I don't personally have bipolar but I do have PTSD. I get triggers that seem to come out of no where but there's always a reason behind it. Having your boyfriend there is really going to help keep you grounded, so there's a plus. Though it is difficult, don't be embarrassed about having episodes. You wouldn't be really embarrassed if you had to use crutches. Try to think of it more as an injury and less as an illness. You doctor should start working you through everything by the next meeting no matter what. If you need to talk before that, do it. Nothing to be ashamed of. That's what they're there for.