I got a 92 (out of 100) in PTSD.

I'm not diagnosed with PTSD. I expressed my concerns that I might have it to a therapist and she told me I didn't rather abruptly (made me feel shut-down?). But in the past, she's told me I didn't have bulimia when I continually made myself throw up after eating (which continued for months and I was even hospitalized because my heart was in danger of giving out) and later told me that nothing was wrong ("I was fine") after I think had a psychotic reaction to meds/ran away at midnight because I saw/felt dark shadowy things chasing me out of the house.

I know not being diagnosed doesn't mean I don't have it but I think I would feel more justified in my emotions and the difficulty I have just functioning every day if I was diagnosed with it and I'd find it a lot easier to ask for help - sometimes people think I ask for help because I'm irresponsible or lazy when I just have mental disorders. Like before I was diagnosed with depression, my dad called me lazy all the time. I wasn't lazy, I was depressed. Before I was diagnosed with/treated for anorexia I didn't even realize my eating habits were extreme or how terribly I was treating myself; it just seemed necessary to lose weight. I didn't think it was a problem (but now I'm happily fully recovered, weight and mentally). I don't like to self-identify, or say I have things if I don't have medical proof of it. I don't want to look like I'm lying or making things up for attention.

I've had a lot of problems with screen memories, and I know/suspect this because I have dreams about what really might've happened and I have flashbacks when something triggering happens. When that happens there's usually a (literally) paralyzing anxiety attack that sometimes lasts more than 30 or 40 minutes. I started having anxiety attacks like this almost every single day around the same time and ended up dropping out of school because of it last semester. Anyways, I'm really looking for advice from anyone who might have something constructive or encouraging to say.. Thanks for reading.