I still think his comment wasn't about him not being in your corner on the abuse issue. It sounds like he was making an objective note aloud (which, yes, he probably should have just noted to himself internally) about the initiating abuse that set you up for further problems down the road. As he replied, he didn't intend for his remark to be minimizing and regrets that his comment was taken that way.

I've had therapists make note of how my initial abuse was a catalyst (or activating event) for many of the future issues and further abuse I suffered as I grew older. They didn't mention that to minimize my abuse, but rather, to help me understand the connection between that initial event and future events. So in my case, that term "activating" was about how that initial abuse set off a chain of abuse events and also my own pattern of how I internalized and responded to those events in my life.

I don't know if that is where your T was when he made that observation, but I do hope you will allow him to try to more clearly explain what he was referring to and perhaps help you understand how that information might be important in putting the pieces of your puzzle together (if that is what he was getting at).

It sounds like otherwise your therapy with him as been good. This is one of those times when taking the time to talk and listen and try to come to understanding for both you will be important. Hope it all works out well for you.