Quote:
Originally Posted by BudFox
That is a terrible bind you are in. Becoming vulnerable and then ending up in a no-win situation like you describe, that is horrible. Hope you can end things in some way that leaves you with a measure of dignity and autonomy. If she did want to terminate you, do you think you'd be able to call her on the hypocrisy and deception?
I was in a no-win situation also. And in fact my therapist said explicitly that I had formed an unhealthy attachment to her. The way she said this was very telling, because it put the blame squarely on me. She should have acknowledged that the dependency was a direct result of her lavishing attention on me, and her emotional entanglement with me, and many other aspects of her behavior and of therapy. If you love bomb people who are love deprived or in a desperate situation or crisis, what in god's name do you think is going to happen?
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Thank you. It's good to feel understood, although I hate knowing that others have found themselves similarly situated. I'm sorry that happened to you.
I've been mulling over the idea of making a final appointment and asking T outright if she's going to terminate me. If she is, I'm not going to give her the satisfaction of telling her what I know about her and how I know it. Let her wonder and worry--it's only fair! On the other hand, if she is amenable to working through the issue … well, I'm not sure. As you said, I'm really in a bind. I'd love to find closure and peace and put the entire therapy experience behind me forever, but I'm afraid that going back may only reignite the attachment thing--not that it's ever far from my thoughts--and further ensnare me in the whole mess. I keep telling myself I don't have to make an immediate decision, but I've already taken 3 1/2 weeks and haven't come up with a solution.