I've posted about this a lot in the addictions section, but I wanted to get some takes from someone with BP.

I had a suboxone addiction (started recreationally, became physical addiction) for four years. It lasted so long because I was always scared to go through withdrawal. Well after an IP stay in which a drunken night put me there, I said "enough of this, I'm alone now and it's my fault, it's time". I even tried sneaking a sub into IP. Then I was honest with my pdoc there and he gave me a small amount of sub a day so I wouldn't get sick. Then he tells me to stay on it! I said no. And I haven't drank since the night I went into the hospital (August 13th) and I got over suboxone withdrawal with help of meds and an herbal tea that I can't name here. So maybe I cheated. Either way I'm over my addiction and I'm clean. Sorry but you go through sub WD and tell me how great it is. I was honestly only bad for about two days. The daily dose is 24mg!! I was only taking 2mg a day.

It's been a few weeks now and I'm finding sobriety to be painful. I've even tried to find stuff. Anything to get a different feeling. I'm sorry but being sober ****ing sucks. I'm stressed and having problems with property taxes and bills. I can't work and going for social security. All I want to do is drink to forget or find something to alter my thoughts. How do you cope with a new sobriety when you have no support? It's hard because the people I'm still close to, are users. They're family and all I have. But they've offered me stuff. I declined but it was hard. I even had an emotional breakdown in front of my bf and said "I can't do this!"

Also, a friend of mine was msging me on fb saying he was high on suboxone. Wtf?! How are you going to rub that in my face after what I'm going through?! I blocked him.

This was mostly a vent but the question is, how do YOU cope with a fresh sobriety? I also JUST started seeing a T. Should I be honest with her about this? I also have BPD and am impulsive which makes this even harder.