I think I get what you mean Rainbow. I have a very loving and caring mother yet I still feel strong maternal transference towards my T. I am beginning to understand that while my mother loves me I often feel (and have done for a long time) that she doesn't really understand me and consequently is unable to meet a lot of my emotional needs. I often feel judged by my mother and often feel as though I need to hide how I feel to protect her. I don't feel either of those things with my T and that makes me wish T was my mum.

Despite understanding this, I still don't think it is a "good enough" reason for my issues. Maybe that is what is happening for you? As in logically you can kind of see what's happening but it doesn't feel justified maybe? I don't know, just a thought.