Hi everyone.

I'm currently reading the classic John Bradshaw book, Healing the Shame that binds you, and I've stumbled upon this quote in the book.

" Grandiosity, extreme self-involvement, and lack of interest and empathy for others, in spite of the pursuit of others to obtain admiration and approval"

I related to this quote with my father a lot. My father used and may be still, despite his old age, to seek peoples approval and admiration to an extreme degree. He basically treats people better than his family members, just to seek approval and admiration. He would do an incredible amount of work for others, while he completely lacks any energy, care, empathy, interest toward us. It drove my Mother crazy, because he kind of manipulated people's opinions about who he really is. Everyone outside the family circle would consider him a " great man".

I also related this behavior with the Pete Walker's book, Complex CPTSD, about the Fight/Fawn type of personality. Gravitating towards Fight in home, while being completely Fawn type with other people.

I'm just curious if you lived with such person! and I'm also curious about this dynamic, The individual lacks empathy and yet he seeks people's approval and affirmation via being too involved with them meeting their needs. its seems paradoxical!

Thanks a lot.