You might consider calling Adult Protective Services to report you mother as a person in danger of self-harming. Your mother is very emotionally disturbed. She is also immature, selfish and exploitative. You have every right to get away from her as soon as you can arrange to do that. That will precipitate all kinds of hystrionics from her. I wouldn't put anything past her. What a shame that you have to be a "parent" to the person who is supposed to be your rock to lesn on.

Tell her you will not toleratebeimg eb