Nightdream - you do not have to be responsible for a man who abuses you - regardless of how much he needs you. He needs a caretaker and you are a wife. You survived, as everyone has said - you are here and we all care and understand. I dare say most of us come from an abusive relationship. I am in one now where one minute he is fine and the next he is angry and yelling. My T wants him to come in with me to talk about how his anger affects me (makes me depressed and think about dying) but so far he has refused to come in. Anger is so scary when we grow up in angry households. Continue to survive - continue to be the good person you are - committed to not causing harm to others - but that does not mean you have to allow others to cause harm to you. Please take care of yourself.