I can completely relate to you. ((HUGS)). I found from my experience that time heals. There are people in my life who have forgiven me for things, and there are people in my life who may have not fully forgiven, but forgotten things. As time goes by, people will notice positive changes in yourself since you've learned from them and that you are not defined by your mistakes.

All you can do is take responsibility, but after you do so, just focus on moving forward and don't try to over analyze things or replay mistakes like a record in your head. I know it's easier said than done, and I've been there many times before. However, this approach has helped make things easier.

Also, be kind to yourself. Forgive yourself. None of us our perfect, and living with Bipolar Disorder is hard. I sometimes find inspiring self-help videos online or read. That's something that helps me at least.