Asperger's is now called ASD (Autistic Spectrum Disorder). There can be many different reasons for behaviors like that, but when they all come together sometimes it seems obvious to us whether it's formally dx'ed or not.....but when it's not formally Dx'ed, then it's just something we end up sensing is probably the explanation but not 100% sure.

I was married to a man for 33 years who after I finally left him, looking back, most of his behavior indicated that it was ASD that I had been struggling with all those years. It does take special understanding & patience to adapt to their ways of thinking, communicating & even behaviors.....but in saying that.....in reality....each person is completely different from the other because it is a spectrum disorder....no 2 behaviors are the same. Some are much more subtle than others.

I have found that people at my age have been undiagnosed because they didn't even diagnose Aspergers at that time until 1994 in the US so many older people who actually have it were never Dx'ed & by that time, their parents usually aren't even alive to give information about their childhood beyond what they remember.

The best thing you can do is to just try to sort through their behavior & deal with it on their terms as best as you can. Even if your friend doesn't have ASD, learning about it & possibly dealing with the difficulties in the same way might help you anyway to easier handle the things you are wondering about.