I think part of my guilt comes from the fact that, yes, while I acknowledge that some of the choices I made during my last hypomanic episode were inappropriate, unhealthy, and hurtful to others... I also miss how great I felt at the time. I do want to live a healthy, balanced life where I am content and sharing that contentment with my loved ones. But compared to the rush of hypomania, a stable, "balanced" life feels so... dull. I love feeling hypomanic, while I'm in it. But I recognize that those episodes are very few and far between and that's not "me," and it's not "reality." So while I regret the hurts that I may have caused... I still miss the feeling.
I think that's where most of my guilt and inner conflict comes in. I'm truly sorry for the hurts I've caused. I don't want to continue to hurt anyone. But a little piece of me... would go back and do it all again. Just for that feeling. The feeling of being alive, and so vibrant, just for a little while.
For me, that's the worst part of this disorder. Acknowledging that the times in my life where I have felt the most creative, brilliant, beautiful, seductive, capable and powerful... are just symptoms of an illness.

Thanks for the support, everyone.