I still worry about my almost relation of 13 years ago. I still meander. I still imagine talking to her, asking her about her experiences and hoping to hear her true feelings.

The thing is, I feel one cannot express true feelings in initial stages of romance. You can never tell the other you are infatuated with them. You can never ask them what you did wrong. You can never ask them why they reject you. And they can never tell.

I suspect no failed relation or relation attempt ever has closure for both sides.

It's the only pain that remains. Your feelings for her or him, they will go away. Your self-doubt and regrets, they will stay.