You overthink any and all things Shadix.

I know you don't want to hear this ....... You really need a Therapist to help you find your self esteem and show you ways to feel more confident.

I really do feel bad for you, your either feeling picked on or your coming up with excuse after excuse about who you can date and not date.. All the time.

I see nothing in your post that would need removed, I doubt anyone is surfing the net looking for you typing away on a forum.

Good luck