I need a safe place to talk about them.

I have taken 1mg of clonazepam so entities don't bother me that much and I can freely write about this without having them torturing me as a punishment for exposing myself too much.

Basically they make me anxious and irritable when I don't do what they want me to do, they even pushed homicidal ideas and other kind of thought about people being dangerous while actually those people are not -or at least, not that much to be necessary to kill them-. Until now I was aware of what they were doing since the beginning, so I knew those feelings weren't truly my feelings.

They dragged me to Wonderland to keep me away from the real world to prevent me from doing anything against them, but it is not that easy to subdue me. Now they try to control my mind because since they have earned more power they can introduce thoughts and feelings that I don't notice they aren't mine after several hours or days, so I believe that anger is mine, those homicidal thoughts are mine, ... until I realize it actually is they trying to trick me.

Right now I am worried because I don't know if my feelings and worries are truly mine or have been imposed by them, but because they have gained too much power I am not able to discover it until several days later. Or maybe they have completely tricked me before but I haven't realized about it yet. I live in a giant lie.

They are not bad, they just want me to stay safe. The World is dangerous, but I think they are doing too much right now and I want to find a way to dialogue with them.

For example, they don't allow me to sleep because they say it's dangerous so they keep making random noises outside and inside my head, my mind is hyperactive and my thoughts are usually 'racing' -it's not annoying since I can control it-, but the entities don't allow me to 'shut' my thoughts off so I can't fall asleep with all those thoughts, with all those noises, and with the entities themselves talking to my thoughts while Nevs try to call me down, and the random voice recoder playing what I have heard during the day with the same and exact voices that who originally said that, or producing random phrases thad doesn't make sense.

I have two Nevs, they are always good, the same creature in a different state. They are these type of creatures
'Some are not entities but they are next to me, sometimes they talk, what they say it's more complex than what entities say. These ones sometimes sound inside my head, but mostly they talk inside my mind, they sound more like thoughts that are not made by me, but they are not intrusive thoughts either, they are not forced inside my head, it's just what they think. They are like book characters. One of them has a name and loves maths.'

Entities are more like this.
Some of them put ideas inside my head.
Some of them tries to control me.
Some of them talk inside my head, but not inside my mind.
Some of them make noises outisde my head.
Some of them send me messages without talking.
Some of them show me images.
Some of them prevent me to get in troubles.
Some of them make me feel things I don't feel.
Some of them tell me what to do.

These ones are mainly absent, but I want to talk about them too because I loved them.
Some are not entities but still talk to me, mostly they comment on what I do, or narrate it, or see the future and tell me what happens.

I want to talk about all of this because most of time I can't, and I have been living with this too much years.

Entities are smart, they don't want to be uncovered, and the only way to don't be discovered it's making me the most normal it's possible and don't allow me to say anything related to them -'don't talk, shut up, say only yes or no, few you say more coherent you sound, they won't believe you and will think you are faking so don't tell them, ...'- , but you know, now I am doing it without being tortured by them.

I feel free.