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Old Sep 09, 2016, 10:31 PM
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Lauliza Lauliza is offline
Grand Magnate
 
Member Since: Nov 2009
Location: United States
Posts: 3,231
Quote:
Originally Posted by awkwardlyyours View Post
Okay, so this thread has been totally hijacked.


So, my experience with this --


- I was willing to pay out of pocket (no insurance) to repeatedly tell former T how she'd screwed up (in general but especially with respect to a very specific incident that happened about 10 months ago and which never got resolved to my satisfaction).


- She was willing -- more than willing, went out of her way in fact -- to make sure that I kept showing up i.e., kept paying up and did not terminate (I did finally terminate).


- However, and here's the kicker -- she (who's psychodynamic) was not willing to make any space for my anger. Not at all.


- In case anyone would like to inform me that her unwillingness was a projection of my no-doubt crazy mind etc -- nope, I relayed exact words to other Ts I interviewed (who generally were notoriously unwilling to acknowledge that any T could screw up) and every one of them (especially current T) said that what former T said / did in response to my anger was out of whack (what they attributed the out-of-whack-ness to was what they differed in but no one disputed that her responses were nutso).


- So yeah, this stuff about Ts "ethically" not wanting to take a client's money "just to listen" to them express their anger has well........little to do with what I experienced.


- Whether Ts should or shouldn't be willing to work with a client's anger is a different issue. I think it's a rather poor T who is unwilling to do it for as long as the client expresses a need. But, I understand that like every profession, there are a lot of lousy Ts out there and clients with low expectations of Ts (supply and demand etc) and so, if the "fit" in that sense exists, who am I to question?


To keep seeing you and accept money but make no space for your anger is wrong, in my opinion. I'm sure there are many who will do this and it's unfortunate. It's also a testament to the amount of Ts in the field who are very screwed up individuals.
Thanks for this!
awkwardlyyours, divine1966, Gavinandnikki