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Old Sep 11, 2016, 11:52 AM
songofthesea songofthesea is offline
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Member Since: May 2016
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Posts: 83
Quote:
Originally Posted by stopdog View Post
Do you or would you reassure or give positive feedback to the therapist you hire? If you do, do you know why?
Do you have the desire to give them positive feedback or want to make them feel good about themselves and how they do therapy at you?

I don't and do not, but the idea came up in another thread and I was wondering if others had a different take on it.

I am not going to reassure a therapist. I figure if she is feeling bad or uncertain - good - she probably should be doing so.
I did tell the woman if anything she said or did anything that was ever useful, I would let her know. But when I tried to tell her that her staying back was the one thing she managed to do well, she got defensive. Luckily nothing else has come up, but if it did, I probably would not bother trying again.

She did one time say, being sarcastic, "heaven forbid I feel good about my job" - I was like "what are you going on about?" - The woman makes no more sense to me than I do to her.

I keep showing up and handing her money. I don't know why I would need or want to do anything more than that.
It sounds like some countertransference issues? It sounds like you paid her a backhanded compliment. Maybe it says something about how you have been treated in the past - the kind of praise / insults you have received, and how she feels - insulted, unworthy, useless, is a reflection of how you felt then, but you have since internalised it? I've also told my therapist that I don't know that it's helpful, but I've said that it's "not unhelpful" and he replied that he'd quite like to have more of an impact than that.