I think manipulation should be listed as one of the 7 deadly sins....
Its such a subtle, quiet attack. You don't even realize its happening at first, and then when you do, you ignore it, or just follow along so the boat doesn't rock. Often the manipulator is trying to get you to do something mundane...so you pick your battles and just give in. You take that subtle hint to get up from the dinner table to get the milk from the fridge...
No biggie right?
Wrong. THe problem is...this technique worked for them, so they use it to get more and more from you. And even if you recognize what is going on...it usually doesn't stop, they just change tactics. I decided to quit taking the hints, the subtle play on words meant to make me feel guilty so I would do what my husband wants, I thought...I'm through with this. Ill just quit playing the game. The thing is...everytime he tries to manipulate me. Its like having your ear flicked. It doesn't really hurt. But you notice it, and its annoying. By the end of the day...you have had your ear flicked 40 times. Now it hurts, you are angry and annoyed. BUT THE WORST PART...is they claim innocence. It wasn't a direct attack...so they didn't do anything wrong. It makes you feel like maybe your wrong, or exaggerating. This is their ace in the hole...they can manipulate you into doing or feeling what they want...without getting caught or putting up a fight.
I'm a fairly intelligent woman, good at assessing social situations, I actually never thought I would be a victim of manipulation. There were times I knew my husband was doing it, I just thought...I wont participate. There, problem solved. I guess it doesn't really work that way...it actually only takes one person to play the game of manipulation.