This is my first post to the site, and it was your post that found me nodding my head in agreement with some of the feelings you were expressing.

I, too, wonder if the experiences of the past have forever altered my perceptions of 'normal'.

I have had the identical experience of amazement that people actually go out feeling perfectly safe walking around town after dark. I would probably come out of my skin if I were to walk around town alone after dark.

You hear all of the time that there is no such thing as 'normal', but I look around, especially at what seem to be 'normal' experiences being enjoyed by 'normal' people and try to figure out how I can get there.

I often feel like I am trapped in the tower of a fortified castle (by my own fears and seemingly misguided perceptions), watching the people in the village bustle about, wishing I could leave and simply join in.

What stinks is that I am holding myself captive.