Hi Exhale I think my past experiences are holding me captive. But you know, 15yrs ago this new yrs eve will be the anniversary of another event that happened in my life. I lived next door to some squatters who set the house alight and died, One jumped out the window and landed in my front garden, he died and another died inside and a woman managed to hang on sitting on the windown sill ,waiting for the fire brigade. Unyet on the 1st anni of that event I seem to let it go, I remember it from time to time but it doesn't effect my day to day functioning. Unyet other stuff does. So I guess my point is maybe it is possible to get past stuff??? I don't know. I think its the volience I witnessed and at times took part in that has the greatest effect.

I think I've rambled to much here :-(

ANyways I hope things work out for you someday too!