Its so warm to receive replies here. Thank you so much for all of your warm messages.

Yes I found psychologist half a year ago, but I stopped visiting for a few reasons. Not because my psychologist cant help me, but a few reasons... one main reason is I cannot afford the big costs of regular visit. I'm not sure how US or European people view visiting psychologist, but it's an expensive to many people here, not a necessity cost at life.

Another reason is I think I have said all of my past , what I encountered in the past to my psychologist, some of my thinking were changed positively after counselling, but the family problem is still here, and worst of all, I just feel like I lack the motivation to make me feel good. It seems I know some ways,i.e exercise, meditation... but what I wanna do is to escape all of the things , all of my responsibilities