I can relate with the OP and many of you. I was sexually abused as a small child, and raped as a teenager by an older guy. I hate sex. I don't like it at all. I don;t want to be kissed, the thought of it repulses me. I don't like to be touched or hugged. Do not lick me (reminds me of a dog) do not kiss me, and do nto try to have sex with me and we will get along fine. Not many men will go for that though.

I am married and have been for 22 years. I do have sex. Most of the time I do it only to meet my H's needs. I often cry during sex, nto becasue it hurts or it is unpleasant, it is something that just comes over me. If I don'[t cry during sex, I cry afterwards. It is very awkward. Sometimes it makes me want to throw up. Just that it is gross. When I do have sex with my H, I keep my short on and my socks on. Anything to minimize physical contact.

This thread is about you and not me though, I jsut want you to know that you are not alone in how you feel and that I can completely relate.