View Single Post
 
Old Sep 14, 2016, 08:07 PM
Fightharder Fightharder is offline
Member
 
Member Since: Dec 2015
Location: Santa Monica
Posts: 28
Hi
I'm writing you in this forum because I'm lost, I have a husband who love me so much and a puppy that I love more than my self, but I'm passing a difficult situation ... For 2 years I suffered been mobbed in my work, nobody couldn't help me. Of course, I lost my job. I'm trying to start a demand against my ex supervisor, but the things are progressing slowly. Now that I'm jobless and since two years ago I have suffered from insomnia, always waking up between 3ams and 5am. The accupunturist told me that's because my liver and lungs that I wake up, that I have anger and sadness. Accupunture is slow and I'm still sufferin waking up. I'm trying valerian oil to see if that helps. I stopped using Advil and Tylenol PM, because I took them for almost 1 year and a half. Indeed as the accupunturist said, I'm still angry and sad because in my previous work nobody helped me, even I was suffering from mobbing and I just was targeted without do anything to deserve that. Hopefully my demand progress
In the meantime along those 2 years I become a different person that I used to be, I was energetic, sleep a lot, just to be playful person with my husband, I love my puppy, so seen my puppy helped me to feel better, I just to play with him too.i used to meditated and this helped me also. I had an injury ( because the stress I had in my work) that took me 1 year and a half to heal, so a stopped running because that.
Now because this insomnia I don't have energy to play with my husband, with my puppy, barely some days run and do exercise. I forgot who I used to be, my husband is sad and worry and I feel shame on because my puppy been so cute, I can't enjoyed enough. I'm losing precious time of my life because this insomnia, friends and readings suggest I forgive to let go angryness and sadness, to fully recover. But I don't feel I can do that. I don't meditate anymore. Sometimes when I think in the person I became. I cry, I didn't ask for this. I don't feel passion for the job I used to do. Im fragile and vulnerable, and I dont like that, I'm not like that
Please help, I really need to sleep well to have energy to recover my self, my life, make happy my husband and puppy, do exercise and enjoy it that is part of my identity, have clearity about if I'm going to do the same job or make a change
My self confidence is smashed, my confidence and positivity became dust. I don't believe in me and others, in life. I know life is beatiful, I'm a blessed person, but the lack of energy, because don't sleep is like a demon, don't let me appreciate how blessed I am, even I know I'm blessed
.... Thanks

Last edited by Fightharder; Sep 14, 2016 at 08:13 PM. Reason: Adjustments
Hugs from:
mindwrench, Sad Eyes Sparkle 2, Skeezyks