((NoIdeaWhatToDo))

Sounds like you are a great mom, and a logical, critical thinker (not to mention, patient). I have no experience that matches what you are going through, but a couple of things come to mind that were a help to me.

I feel it is important to point out that a behavior is not the person. There is a distinct difference. We all do what we'd think is stupid, but does not make us, as people, stupid, etc. It seems like you have covered that, but not in the same words.

My mom shared this with me about his age: "You are not better than anyone else, but you are just as good". A phrase I still think of when I need it. JUST AS GOOD!

Will be thinking of you and your family.