I am glad to announce that I am at a stable place in life. I have two good paying part-time jobs, I have a decent amount of friends, and I am not under enormous stress. Basically, I am at a peaceful place in life now.

So why am I going crazy?

Earlier this year, I had a severe depressive episode where I cut myself and spent a night in the hospital. Here's the thread: http://forums.psychcentral.com/bipol...triggered.html

I couldn't figure out what was driving me crazy, and neither could my therapist. We both assumed work was stressful for me, but even that didn't seem to add up. Something was wrong, and I couldn't put a finger on it.

For the past two weeks, I've been experiencing similar symptoms where I am irritable, depressed or thinking other people are out to hurt me. I've also been experience a desperate need to be creative. I suddenly want to work on a screenplay and take a sewing class so I could learn to make clothes. Mind you, none of this is coming out of left field; I have plans to write a screenplay and I have an on/off interest in making clothes. I am a creative person by nature. It is just that instead of waiting to do all these things, I want to do them now!

I also am seriously considering leaving one of my jobs (at a newspaper) so I could freelance. Since I'm not in the best financial state to do that, I am practically looking around for barista or waitress jobs - even though I have little experience there.

The other day, I finally realized what is wrong with me: I'm bored. I don't feel excited with life and I want to do all the aforementioned to add excitement to my life. I also feel if I do not do anything drastic as soon as possible, I will suffer another bout of deep depression, like I did back in the spring.

I read that boredom and bipolar disorder is a dangerous mix, because it could lead to depression or irrational moves. Boredom comes when stability and structure takes place, which is needed for bipolars, but comes at a price it seems.

How can I cope? What should I do? I've already contacted my psychiatrist and I'll probably get my meds changed (I have an appointment next week). But I am really scared that I may do something stupid or suffer from deep depression again. It seems one or the other will occur. Honestly, I'd rather do something like quit my good job and do something risky, than experience that form of depression again. I was out of control back then, and I don't want to go down that route again.

Help me!