Hello RoseofSharon: This is interesting. Honestly, I don't think I've ever really given this much thought... if any. My wife & I have been married for around 37 years. (Her accomplishment... not mine. I don't know how she's managed it!)

My parents have both been gone for years now. And, looking back, it's difficult to recollect how I interacted with, & reacted to, my mother. Thinking about it, it seems like I can recall my interactions with my father more than I can my mother. So I don't know as I could say to what extent how I interact with my wife is affected by how I interacted with my mother. (Maybe that's an indication that this influence wanes with the passage of time.)

I was an only child. One thing I do recall, is that I learned very early in life to be secretive. And I also developed a strong predilection for isolating myself. This only became stronger as I grew into my teenage years. And both my penchants for secretiveness & isolating have continued to loom large in my life down through the present time when I am now aging. From my perspective, I doubt we ever manage to free ourselves entirely from the parental-relationship experiences we have growing up.

Thanks for posting this. I enjoyed reading & replying to it.