I think it is about being safe...

about maintaining a safe environment where we know the sounds & smells. The tactile sensations and the visual cues. Everything
is safe here. In that space, It reduces hyper vigilance and input overload. Randomness occurs when interacting with others and new or confusing spaces and loss of control of self sets in.

You also say this too about pushing ppl away from us, those that love us or try to love us in a way we understand. Become targets of this burning desire to maintain safety.

I say we here because I am not the only one.