I'm in tears....

My T did e-mail me back...I told her in the letter about the transference thing...

She said that she thought so...but she's 45 old enough to be my mother and that it'd interupt with therapy.. I knew that...but it hurt so bad..I felt she was yelling at me...but in fact she was whispering it to me... I'm so F'ing sensative..I'm in tears because of it...and I wanted her to e-mail me back...

I know i gotta try I gotta try hard to beat this beast...she also told me I would get through this..she told me not to sit inside so much...but I dont have anything to go to outisde of my box...

I'm in frantic...I'm so frantic....I dunno what to do anymore..I just want to lay in someones arms and cry...i iwsh i could lay in my moms...but we aren't so close.....

I'm fading...I need my T .....

I need hope.....

I need myself