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My belief is that God is always with us and suffers our pains with us whether physical, psychological, or spiritual. That is not to belittle the pain that you are feeling, but rather the emphasize the radical empathy that is implied in a belief in the Transcendent God.
I'm sorry for your suffering.
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“In the twilight of life, God will not judge us on our earthly possessions and human successes, but on how well we have loved.” + John of the Cross
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