I hope life gets easier for you. I had been married for 24 when I divorced. We had to go to no contact because we were both bitter. He remarried soon after our divorce, too. It's been 22 years since we got divorced and have finally come to a place where we can communicate again. We each forgave each other for hurtful things said and done. We are at peace now, but we needed the space that no contact gave us to let things heal.