Thinking that self injury is helpful or provides some real kind of relief could be distorted thinking. You haven't talked much on here about magical thinking or rules, but it could be something to explore.

I'm sorry that you're in this situation but if new providers aren't an option maybe the answer is to cooperate fully with the providers you have? I seriously doubt they're just trying to be mean to you; I think they're doing what they think is the best thing to help you. It might not be what you want but a little acceptance goes a long way.

I've been following your posts since I joined and it's clear you're in significant pain and it's equally clear that nothing they've tried so far has helped. Again, I'm sorry you're going through this but maybe you can find a way to get something positive out of it. Ask them what concrete steps you can and should take. "Stop magical thinking" isn't a concrete step. It's a goal.