I never know whether to tell my doctor I am still having anxiety, for fear that he'll want to try a different prescription (I take 3 Klonopin a day, pretty much the max he'd ever prescribe anyone), or to tell him that I am good, for fear that he'll want to wean me off it.

So I wind up having these erratic sessions over a long period of time, where I appear stable one month and a mess the next. I'm afraid if I'm ever "okay", he'll change things, and I won't be okay anymore. And I'm never really okay, because I live in fear every month, wondering how much longer I have before he feels I've been on it too long.

Afraid to bring any of this up because I'll look like an addict trying to secure his prescription long term. I've abused pills before, but not with this particular doctor, so there are some layers of real paranoia going on.