Ohhhh I am so with you in this. I am sorry you are struggling. Typically I do not blame God for anything because I can see my own part in the messes I end up in. However, I have tried *everything* humanly possible to escape this crippling depression and I cannot do it. I have prayed and prayed, and am actually going through intercessory healing prayer with someone now, once a week for two hours. I have no relief. I never want to doubt God, however, this depression is clearly physiological, but I do feel forsaken.

My therapist helped me to realize that mental illness is an illness. Diabetes is an illness. Cancer is an illness. RA is an illness. Ours is more challenging because it is not accepted many times as an illness and everyone loves to give advice on how to overcome it, where no one would give a diabetic the advice to "think positive".

If you can see this time in contrast to eternity, it is quite short in comparison. Although the micro-view is excruciatingly long. One day this will all make sense, but our capacity to understand now is limited.

I pray for strength, endurance and wisdom as you press forward my friend. And please know you are in really good company in this battle.