No not really but I trust him more than my GP because after being in the hospital over that whole pancreas thing I am afraid she's going to give me a diabetes med that's going to kill me when I see her again Tuesday.

November cant come soon enough because that's when I get my new GP. I am praying she's better and actually listens to me. The one I have now don't listen to me at all and I really am afraid she's going to kill me.

I also secretly fear that one day they will lock me up and throw away the key over this whole bipolar thing. I really fear going manic because I am afraid they might not let me out of the hospital again. It might be irrational but I do fear it. I just keep it to myself for the most part.