I backed out.

This was unbelievably hard to do. Everyone who knew about my anxiety told me to but backing out of something I've committed to is as bad as the anxiety of doing it in the first place. On the one hand I am frightened of screwing up and the other I am convinced they will then hate or think ill of me. In the end I chose to excuse myself. I have a vailid one thank goodness but it doesn't make me feel any better. I just feel like I couldn't win no matter what I chose to do.