I could have written this .. so so similar .. it's a dreadful 'feeling'. I was diagnosed last year (after a nervous breakdown with hospitalisation) with Melancholic Depression. Prior to that episode, my diagnosis was a different type of depression which all the usual drugs had little to no effect. I am now taking Nortriptyline (100mg) .. from the Tricyclic antidepressants and Risperidone .. anti-pyschotic (1mg) at night. The Risperidone is a 'kick start' to the Nortriptyline. I am at the maximum dose of Nortriptyline because of heart problems. There is a great site here in Australia called the Black Dog Institute which has very detailed descriptions of different types of depression and what can help .. you may find you have been given antidepressants which don't suit your type of depression, as I was for many years. The combination I take now helps a lot, not every day do I feel positive, but I find life a lot easier and have less anxiety and panic attacks and that awful feeling of total hopelessness. The very warmest of wishes to you.