View Single Post
 
Old Sep 23, 2016, 05:59 AM
Abby Abby is offline
Grand Member
 
Member Since: Dec 2003
Posts: 826
Oh I really don't want to be in therapy for 30 years! It's that balance isn't it between working at processing but at a pace that allows you to have your life externally. Continually getting upset and having days unable to function isn't worthwhile, I'd rather not do therapy! Thanks for your support.

Magicalprince - thank you that relates to my issues substantially. I have tried avoiding it and carrying on, and I'm trying to give it a space but it's impossible with no course of action as it leaves me feeling helpless because there is nothing I can *do* and that just reignites the anger/hurt etc. What do you mean live more organically? I've been trying to just get by for so long, that now I want some help that makes sense. I want ways to decompress, to not feel so horrid unable to function at times. I like your ideas. I'm very good at setting external boundaries to others and saying no. But if I'm talking about something that is near a pain (often I'm unaware of this till after) then I don't have any boundaries. The person doesn't do anything objectively wrong to me, but I feel that they've lashed out or walked away from me....and I have to work so hard at remembering that isn't true and then at not acting as though that happened because that's what a bit of me wants to do and is catapulted into action due to it. I can't act as though it is real when I'm aware enough now to know this is a pattern for me and it's not. I wonder how I can get internal boundaries? Is that possible? I try to restrain myself outwardly and when I'm in the good mindspace I have great emotional intelligence and can deal with issues well. It's just then I fall dramatically and at random without any warning and I lose all my skills. It's irritating but also even if I had the skills, there is nothing to use them on. Does this make any sense? Thanks for your help. I welcome having it normalised and supported as not being entirely complex. It gives me hope there is a key I can find!