I'm sorry you are feeling so alone and not getting any help. Do you have health insurance? Once I was committed to a mental hospital and found it to be no help at all. I prefer scheduling appointments with my psychiatrist and therapist at their offices. Some will let you call, email, or write between visits (those are the best ones). Don't give up. You deserve to get better but I would try a different place next time. If you don't have insurance, your city's customer service might be able to point you to some more resources that could help you. Good luck.