I have been with my guy for 8 years. Its both been good and bad. However within the last 6-8 months I've really wanted to breakup but can't find a way or time to tell him. I have been going back and forth on if it's something I want or if its just I'm stuck in extreme conflict and and anxiety. Big reasons for not wanting to be with him are, we still aren't married ( I CANT EVEN bring up the m word without it starting a fight), we still don't live together even though we see each other everyday. Extreme lack of sex life (once a month if I'm lucky). A lot of the things I thought we had in common in the beginning have really started to fizzle. I have brought these issues to him many many times and nothing gets resolved or talked about.
I want to give him the benefit of the doubt and chalk it up to the terrible year I have been having. I want he'd my dad suffer and eventually die from cancer early this year, had a surgery myself , been dealing with other medical issues that have yet to be resolved, and of course the everyday stresses of debt bills and having enough money for food. All these things have caused me to develop severe anxiety that will give me panic attacks out of no where. I do not take medicine at this time.
I have noticed at tines I do tend to take my anxiety and depression from these out on him but at the same time i feel like I'm stuck in the dead end of the relationship and life and I need a change. Can anyone offer some insight on what to say or do? Or should I wait things out longer ?