Yes, people do run their lives as they want. But it's a matter of respect for the other person that is my issue.


You write that your friends 'get' that you won't respond to their Facebook posts right away unless it was an emergency. What that implies is that your friends know your limits and thus respect your limits. That's my point. My (former) friend in the 8 years of our friendship knows what my limits are with communication and this includes social media and the telephone.


Ok, you're like the third poster to dismiss my belief that using "busy" instead of just telling the truth is rude, when you say "there's nothing wrong or right about it." For you it's no big deal. That's your limit. For me it is a big deal. "I'm too busy" is just an excuse to avoid spending time with that person.


I'm in my late 40s but age has nothing to do with making a choice and prioritizing relationships. Neither does the duration of the friendship -- you either choose to respect that friend's limits/boundaries/expectations, or you don't.


And this isn't a 'pick your battle' kind of scenario. As I wrote, with any relationship you set your expectations up so the other person knows your boundaries, or your limits with what you consider respectful or disrespectful behavior.


For me, it's not ok to wait nearly 2 months to respond to my phone call with an email. That is where I draw the line, because it goes past my limits (what I will tolerate) because I think that it's rude. Maybe some people think my expectations or limits are too rigid but I think those are different for everyone. Since I would never wait 2 months to respond to someone who reached out to contact me, I expect the same treatment from others. And while I am willing to give friends a break with many things, this isn't one of them.


There is no such thing as 'too busy.' It's about priorities.