ok how many people have on ignore? like the whole of PC bar about 2 people?? im sorry im such a horrible pain. if this is really the case you know i wont make the effort to reach out or to ask for help because i really dont want to be a nuisance.
i cant figure out if this is the case of if im actually losing my grip on reality and my feelings are ruling my thoughts. am i so self centred and self obsessed and disgustingly arrogant and demanding? i cant see straight at the moment about anything. or am i seeing straight? maybe im losing it and need a reality check or maybe this is the reality check and i need to accept it. if i try to do that i really think i will go over the edge. im so out of control right now. i know i sound 12 but i cant seem to get out of this mindset. im on a knife edge between "i cant do any of the things in my head because they re bad and wrong" and "i literally cant take any more and have to make life stop".
i cant do this. i just cant do this.