I feel sick to my stomach. I had T today and was asked if I was still anxious about my health and if I was still doing some habits that I wasn't supposed to. I said that I was fine and I hadn't done the habits for a week (which was a lie). On the contrary, I wasn't able to eat, sleep, or focus on anything but my health anxiety and two nights ago I was crying hysterically in my moms bed and sat up until 5 in the morning until my body just shut down and I passed out and slept the entire next day.

I guess the reason I lied was because I didn't want to let my T down because when I said I didn't know what I wasn't supposed to, my T got so happy and said she was so proud of me and I'm extremely motivated about my goals. Now if I tell her I lied, who knows what shell think of me and how disappointed shell be.

The only way shell know I was lying was if I email her about it, which Im contemplating. (My T always encourages emailing).

Im stuck.. Any thoughts? Thanks!