I have been obsessing that the reason I have no friends is because I feel chronic jealousy of other people that I don't know how to deal with. I feel like I always have the be the best and feel almost threatened when someone is better than me to the point of where I just want to be alone to avoid the comparisons I will eventually make.
This is so narcissistic and depressing and I really don't know what to do about it and I feel like I'm just an evil person deep down. How can I change this quality?